恩言雜誌

Gracious Words

Saying No to Complacency

Ashley Tan

I’ve been going to Chinese Grace Bible Church (CGBC) for as ashleytanlong as I can remember. When I was young and still in Sunday school, I was a terrible kid. Actually, if you met me then, you’d probably think I was one of the best kids in class, but you would be very wrong. I was always the first to memorize the verses; I knew all the Bible stories; and I could answer all the questions the teachers asked; but I did all that because I thought it made me “super spiritual.” I loved bragging about how spiritual or cool I was to all my friends. So, of course, when Vacation Bible School (VBS) came around and I heard the Gospel presentation, I raised my hand. Anything to be even more spiritual! Then I was brought into a room where my Sunday school teacher talked to me and told me I was a sinner BUT, Jesus died for my sins, and I could go to heaven and be with Him if I accepted him as my Savior. Scared I would go to hell, I prayed the sinner’s prayer and accepted Christ into my heart.

As a young second grader, I barely understood what had just happened, and so no life change took place for a good while. In fact, I accepted Christ many more times after that by myself when I wasn’t sure if it was “for real” the last time I did it. Finally at VBS in sixth grade, I had Rebekah Wong as my crew leader. She asked our crew, “From one to 100 percent, how sure are you that you are saved?” That was probably the first time anyone had challenged me about my faith. That was when I realized that Christianity wasn’t just a religion where I go to church and pray; but rather, it was my life. I thought about her question and decided that I was in fact saved, but I sure wasn’t living like it. Once I started middle school and joined the youth group, Teens In God’s Service (TIGS), I met a ton of older and more mature Christians who encouraged me in my walk with Christ. I started taking my faith more seriously and began doing my devotions (Bible studies) regularly, serving at VBS and getting more connected with the people at church.

After that spiritual “growth spurt,” I became more comfortable in my faith and didn’t feel a need for God or a need to continue growing. It wasn’t really until my sophomore year in high school that I had some of the toughest times of my life. I struggled to balance basketball, school, church, and family; I was staying up late every night; my grades were slipping; and I grew more distant from my friends at church, since I was always busy with Advanced Placement chemistry. After months of endless school, it was time for the annual Mexico Outreach Team (MOT) girl_prayermissions trip. I was excited for a break from school and was determined to forget my troubles during that week. On that trip, I learned that God has a better plan for me, and a purpose for my life. I also realized that my life was much more than just studying for school, and that He calls us to share the Gospel and act like Christ wherever we go. After Mexico, I came home with a whole new perspective on life and didn’t put as much value on things of this world like school or sports. Since then I still had some ups and downs, but God has always been gracious to lead me back to Him whenever I’ve gone astray.

Proverbs 30:7-9 says, “Two things I ask of you, O LORD; do not refuse me before I die: Keep falsehood and lies far from me; give me neither poverty nor riches, but give me only my daily bread. Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you and say, ‘Who is the LORD?’ Or I may become poor and steal, and so dishonor the name of my God.” This is my prayer to God now: that I wouldn’t be too comfortable in life, lest I grow complacent in my faith. As Andy Mineo says in his song Uncomfortable,

He said it’s hard for a rich man to get to heaven
When we feel like we don’t need God, then we forget Him…
So if you wanna live a comfortable life
Make sure you never love nobody,
be selfish and never sacrifice.

The Christian life wasn’t meant to be easy. And God used my struggles to bring me closer to Him. That’s why today I’m taking this step of baptism—because Jesus commands it, and to encourage you all to be “uncomfortable” with your faith. Thank you.

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