By Tiffany (Keng) Sun, written in loving memory of Joyce Geng, who passed away on 08/24/2020 at the age of 95.

My grandma, who I always called “Nai nai” in Mandarin, passed away at the age of 95 recently. In reflecting back upon her life and her role in my life, I realized that her influence on me was more significant than I had previously realized. When I was younger, especially as a child, I used to feel separated by a culture and generation gap. I was more Americanized; Grandma was traditionally Chinese. From my limited perspective, all I could see as a child and teenager was that she only seemed to care about how well I was doing in school, whether I was smart or would be successful, or later, whether I would finally get married. But now as I reflect back, I see how blessed I was by all the sacrifices that she and Grandpa made for me. I see how evident their love was, even if they never said it out loud. I also realize just how much I had gained from the spiritual example she had set in my life.

For seven years of my childhood, starting from when I was two years old, my grandparents lived with our family and helped to take care of my brother and me. Now that I have two young kids of my own, I realize what a tremendous sacrifice that was and how much hard work that must have been, taking care of two little kids day in and day out. Their sacrifice meant that even though Mom and Dad were both working, we always had someone waiting for us at home right after school. We could go home instead of afterschool care and stay home during the summers. We always had an extra set of adults for anything we needed and to give us love.

As an adult, Nai nai was always there to remind me to take care of myself. Her favorite thing to say to me was, “Drink lots of water and eat vegetables. It’s good for you.” My brother Tim and I use to laugh about it because it seemed such a silly thing for her to say to us as adults. Ironically, I find myself saying the same exact thing to my own kids.

When I had my first baby, Nai nai was delighted for me. By that time, she was in her 90’s already. Her memory seemed to be fading, and she was often forgetful or confused. Yet, she asked me questions that pinpointed the exact things I was wrestling with as a new mother. She’d ask me: is the baby sleeping well, is the baby sleeping in his own room, how is the baby feeding, are you able to feed him your own milk? Her questions and comments gave me a glimpse into a side of her that I had previously not seen – that at one time, she was a new mother too, raising her two babies. It amazed me that there must have been a part of her that must have not forgotten what it was like, even in her old age; her comments to me also made me realize that even two generations later, we were still struggling with the same things as moms of infants. Nai nai would tell me stories of raising my dad and Auntie Ruth and even about the things she had regretted as a mother. I enjoyed learning of and hearing those stories from her, and wish I would have had more time to talk to her about her younger days as a mother.

Beyond all of that, the one lasting impression that Nai nai left on me is her faith in God and that she was a prayer warrior. When I was younger, I saw this through the fact that at all of our family gatherings, she was always the one asked to pray before a meal. We always joked that her prayers were too long because everyone was hungry.

But now when I look back to all those years, I see that I had in her an example of the power of a praying mother, wife, and grandmother. Throughout my life, she always told me that she was praying for me. She was the first example of a prayerful woman in my life, of someone who prayed for the generations after her. I had the privilege of hearing her prayers for her children, her grandchildren and later, her great grandchildren – lifting up all of these generations in prayer. Since becoming a wife and mother myself, I am realizing more the importance of prayer for the family and that women have a unique role in that. I feel blessed that I got to witness in my own life that women can be powerful prayer warriors for their family and that they can impact their families through prayer. I feel blessed that I got to see such a strong example of that in my Nai nai. In her, I see that no matter what life brings, the most important thing I can do, the most significant way I can love my family is to pray for my family like she did. I believe that we (our family) are all where we are today because of her faithful prayers.

Even after she passed, I have been reminded of the many ways she was faithful to the Lord, including actively serving the Lord into her 80’s by leading a fellowship group! In her, I see an example of a mother who shepherded her children to salvation, continued to sacrifice and serve her children and grandchildren in later life, and remained faithful in serving the church well into her 80’s. It has left a deep imprint in my heart of the example her life was. As a working mom myself who often feels torn with the competing priorities of work, children, home, and church, I see how Nai Nai faithfully lived out her calling in all of these roles and faithfully turned to the Lord through it all.
I hope that my brother and I will make her proud with what we are doing with our lives. I wish I could tell her how thankful I am for all the sacrifices she made for us, for taking care of us, and for praying for us.